I love working with new Christ-followers.
One day I got a phone call from a a lady who had taken a friend to buy her first Bible. As they were standing in the Family Bible Bookstore, they became confused with all the types of Bibles on the shelf, so they called me. The call basically went like this:
Caller: "Pastor, we're at the Family Bookstore to buy a Bible, and we wanna make sure we're getting the right kind of Bible."
Me: "Okay, so what did you find?"
Caller: "We found that NLT that you were talking about, but we're not sure it's the right Bible. We think there might be some books in it that aren't s'posed to be there."
Me: "Is it a Catholic Bible? Are you seeing the Apocrypha?"
Caller: "Well, no. The lady working here says it's not a Catholic Bible, but we're not sure. It's got a strange book in it we don't recognize."
Me: "Really? What's the name of it?"
Caller: "It looks like it might be pronounced 'lamentations'. That can't be right though, can it?"
Me: "Yup, that's a real book. It's supposed to be in there."
Caller: "Really?!"
Me: "Yup."
Caller: "So it IS s'posed to be in there?"
Me: "Yup."
Caller: "Wow. Okay. We didn't see that coming."
Me: "It's safe. It's supposed to be there."
Caller: "Okay, if you say so. It just didn't seem right. It just sounds like such a really sad book, but we serve a happy God, so we just thought someone might be trying to sneak something in on us."
Me: "Good catch. But it does belong there."
Caller: "Okay, if you say so. Just didn't see that coming. We'll buy it."
:)
Monday, January 31, 2011
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Wednesday Planter: Personal Transition #1: "New" Requires Change. Change Requires Risk. Risk Requires Permission to Fail.
At Adventure, we admit failure. In fact, we encourage people to risk it in ministry. If they're never failing, they aren't taking risks, and that means they're not changing — and if there's no change, there's no hope of growth. (This is hard for me because I’m a perfectionist. In fact, even admitting being a perfectionist is a challenge because to confess perfectionism is to confess being imperfect – something tough for a perfectionist!) :)
I look back on our launch in 1998 and think how many things we totally screwed up, but those same mistakes ultimately added to our strength and our appeal later on.
One of the funnier things was that we hand delivered cook-out invitations to 2500 homes, giving two dates and locations to choose from, and promised people friendly conversation with no obligation. We prepared for the onslaught.
The first night, five people showed up, all in one family, and it was the wife of a pastor who was coming to cheer us on.
The second night, we moved our cookout to a new spot. Three people come (one family). The whole idea was a strategic failure.
Yet that pastor's family who came by that first night was a contact that 7 years later would give us the opportunity to love and minister to 40+ inner city kids from broken homes who needed - now have - a loving church home.
The three who came the second night, was a family who owned a direct mail company. They offered to handle our direct mail at only the cost of the postage — a savings of several thousand dollars for us!
Over the years, we’ve done more things that failed than succeeded, yet none of those positive things would’ve happened had we not been willing to risk failure.
We frequently tell the stories of our failures, and we laugh (some are simply hilarious). But what has often appeared to be a failure at the time has turned into a success later on. Because of that willingness to fail or let people fail, we've done some unique things you won’t find in many other congregations.
The bottom line: New requires risk. While not all change is progress, all progress involves change and risk. Risk requires the opportunity to fail, to change, and to try again. If you’re a perfectionist like me, get over it. Success requires the possibility of imperfections – and lots of them.
I look back on our launch in 1998 and think how many things we totally screwed up, but those same mistakes ultimately added to our strength and our appeal later on.
One of the funnier things was that we hand delivered cook-out invitations to 2500 homes, giving two dates and locations to choose from, and promised people friendly conversation with no obligation. We prepared for the onslaught.
The first night, five people showed up, all in one family, and it was the wife of a pastor who was coming to cheer us on.
The second night, we moved our cookout to a new spot. Three people come (one family). The whole idea was a strategic failure.
Yet that pastor's family who came by that first night was a contact that 7 years later would give us the opportunity to love and minister to 40+ inner city kids from broken homes who needed - now have - a loving church home.
The three who came the second night, was a family who owned a direct mail company. They offered to handle our direct mail at only the cost of the postage — a savings of several thousand dollars for us!
Over the years, we’ve done more things that failed than succeeded, yet none of those positive things would’ve happened had we not been willing to risk failure.
We frequently tell the stories of our failures, and we laugh (some are simply hilarious). But what has often appeared to be a failure at the time has turned into a success later on. Because of that willingness to fail or let people fail, we've done some unique things you won’t find in many other congregations.
The bottom line: New requires risk. While not all change is progress, all progress involves change and risk. Risk requires the opportunity to fail, to change, and to try again. If you’re a perfectionist like me, get over it. Success requires the possibility of imperfections – and lots of them.
Friday, January 21, 2011
Leadership Fridays: Malicious Service Disruptions
As crazy as it sounds, there are people who want to disrupt worship services - for any number of reasons from simple internal disagreements to outside invasions.
A transgendered man had begun attending our services and our people - true to their form and reputation - welcomed him as a person. Within a few days it became clear that his intention was not to find Christ or to get his life together, but to raise money for a sex change surgery. He began approaching people and asking them for money every weekend. When they would hesitate to give him money, he would accost them, accusing them of being "hateful", "intolerant", and "unChristian". I was forced to approach him and tell him he was welcome to continue attending - but that the requesting of money had to stop.
He immediately became quite angry and warned us that the next weekend he intended to return with "friends" to disrupt our services and to teach us "a lesson about intolerance". Finding ourselves now targeted by a militant transgendered group, we were forced to take action in an attempt to prevent any disruption.
His threats forced me to issue a "no trespass order" to preserve the peace, and I then contacted an attorney about creating a warning sign to protect our services. This sign is the result of that conversation.
Because I don't believe the days are gonna get any easier for those of us in the Church, I wanna share this sign with you so you can have this resources in the eventuality that it is needed in your situation. (I hope you never need it, but it is better to be prepared for something that doesn't happen than to be ill-prepared for something that does.)
The text of the sign reads:
ATTENTION:
NO CASH IS KEPT ON THIS SITE, NOR IS IT DISBURSED FROM THIS SITE.
NO CASH IS KEPT ON THIS SITE, NOR IS IT DISBURSED FROM THIS SITE.
ATTENTION:
WORSHIP SERVICES & CHURCH-SPONSORED EVENTS ON THIS SITE ARE PROTECTED BY FEDERAL LAW FROM DISRUPTION OR INTERFERENCE.TITLE 18, U.S.C., SECTION 247
CHURCH ARSON PREVENTION ACT OF 1969
Prohibits [1] intentional defacement, damage, or destruction of any religious real property, because of the religious, racial, or ethnic characteristics of that property, or [2] intentional obstruction by force or threat of force, or attempts to obstruct any person in the enjoyment of that person's free exercise of religious beliefs. If the intent of the crime is motivated for reasons of religious animosity, it must be proven that the religious real property has sufficient connection with interstate or foreign commerce. However, if the intent of the crime is racially motivated, there is no requirement to satisfy the interstate or foreign commerce clause.
Punishment varies from one year imprisonment and a fine or both, and if bodily injury results to any person, including any public safety officer performing duties as a direct or proximate result of conduct prohibited by this section, and the violation is by means of fire or an explosive, a fine under this title or imprisonment of not more than 40 years or both; or if such acts include the use, attempted use, or accordance with this title and imprisonment for up to 20 years, or both, and if death results or if such acts include kidnapping or an attempt to kidnap, aggravated sexual abuse or an attempt to commit aggravated sexual abuse, or an attempt to kill, shall be fined in accordance with this title and imprisoned for any term of years or for life, or both, or maybe sentenced to death.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Wednesday Planter: Personal Transitions in Planting
Personal Transitions in Planting
My whole entry into church planting was spurred by a series of ministries I had in congregations which (at least at the time) had no interest in being effective or in changing. They feigned interest in reaching new people, provided those new people thought like them, dressed like them, talked like them, and did what they were told by them. That raised serious concerns for me.
My brother Tim was the first up close church planter I knew. My brother Matt was the second. They spurred me on by showing me how we could break out of the traditional mold and reach people many Christians would simply write off.
Since my ordination in 1983, it’s always jumped out at me was how the rest of the world was changing its styles, tastes, focus, and energy, but the church wasn’t: The church saw change as a threat. Communities were growing, yet congregations in them remained flat or declining. I pondered, “Why is everything booming but the church?”
I eventually realized businesses and communities were thriving because of change, something in which the church seemed to have no interest. My Bible College years found me — much to the chagrin of a couple profs — questioning what was essential for the church and what was not. I didn’t question theology. I questioned methodology. I began working to distinguish the difference between biblical teaching and modern practice. (In my childhood, you'd have thought short-hair, suits and ties, and hymns WERE biblical!) To this day, I know if I ask a pastor whether he understands the difference between biblical teaching and his denom’s practices – and he glazes over – he's in trouble.
The conclusion I came to is that in order for the church to be relevant to real life and to survive into the future, it needs to understand the change taking place around it, and transition its methodology (not theology!) to reach people.
At Adventure, we say up front in our Articles of Incorporation and our By-Laws: “Each generation of this congregation will continually prepare itself to minister to the following two generations.”
The message stays the same, but how it's delivered and presented must change. That requires a lot of personal transitions for church leaders. Over the next ten Wednesdays, I wanna share with you the transitions I had to make for this to happen for me personally.
My whole entry into church planting was spurred by a series of ministries I had in congregations which (at least at the time) had no interest in being effective or in changing. They feigned interest in reaching new people, provided those new people thought like them, dressed like them, talked like them, and did what they were told by them. That raised serious concerns for me.
My brother Tim was the first up close church planter I knew. My brother Matt was the second. They spurred me on by showing me how we could break out of the traditional mold and reach people many Christians would simply write off.
Since my ordination in 1983, it’s always jumped out at me was how the rest of the world was changing its styles, tastes, focus, and energy, but the church wasn’t: The church saw change as a threat. Communities were growing, yet congregations in them remained flat or declining. I pondered, “Why is everything booming but the church?”
I eventually realized businesses and communities were thriving because of change, something in which the church seemed to have no interest. My Bible College years found me — much to the chagrin of a couple profs — questioning what was essential for the church and what was not. I didn’t question theology. I questioned methodology. I began working to distinguish the difference between biblical teaching and modern practice. (In my childhood, you'd have thought short-hair, suits and ties, and hymns WERE biblical!) To this day, I know if I ask a pastor whether he understands the difference between biblical teaching and his denom’s practices – and he glazes over – he's in trouble.
The conclusion I came to is that in order for the church to be relevant to real life and to survive into the future, it needs to understand the change taking place around it, and transition its methodology (not theology!) to reach people.
At Adventure, we say up front in our Articles of Incorporation and our By-Laws: “Each generation of this congregation will continually prepare itself to minister to the following two generations.”
The message stays the same, but how it's delivered and presented must change. That requires a lot of personal transitions for church leaders. Over the next ten Wednesdays, I wanna share with you the transitions I had to make for this to happen for me personally.
Friday, January 14, 2011
Leadership Fridays: Life Coaching v. Counseling
IMHO, a lot of young pastors (I was one) are naively misguided with the best of intentions. We want to help people. We want to bring to them God’s compassion. Unfortunately, the counseling process is often the opposite of God’s call on us. I don’t do counseling. In fact, I’ve never met a lead or senior pastor who is both 1) in a growing church and 2) any good at counseling.
A large component of our congregation is in recovery of some sort or another: From addictions or abuse, both active and passive (Active meaning they willfully initiated it – alcoholism, substance, gambling, porn; Passive meaning they were afflicted by someone else – sexually, physically, financially, relationally, etc.).
When people ask me if I will counsel them, I explain “I am a triage specialist, not a therapist”. I will then apply the Four Sentence/30-second Rule, and will give them a referral to the appropriate professional people.
If I determine it isn’t counseling but coaching, I’ll meet with them again, but with expectations. Life coaching is a collaborative process in which the coach looks at the player’s attitudes, behaviors and actions directly and gives direction from an outside point of view. He’s not so concerned with how they feel about something as what they do about it. Feeling follows behavior. Let’s work the right behaviors first. If you can’t punch through the feelings to make right choices, well, no one can help someone who isn’t willing to help themselves - and that's why I'm no occupational threat to counselors. I will coach someone for as long as they are making an effort, but I will refer a counselee to a professional counselor.
A specific question follows the process: "How do I know if the player being coached is seriously making an effort at it?" One simple test: Each brief meeting with them gives them three to five things to work on for the next week. I ask them to, within 24 hours, email me what was on that list (as well as to remind me anything else I told them I would provide). I log it into my iPhone to send them a note 48 hours after the meeting if I still have not received their to-do list. Unless there is a really good reason, if I have not heard from them within 72-hours of our meeting, I’m done. If it’s important enough to merit my time, it’s important enough to merit theirs as well.
A large component of our congregation is in recovery of some sort or another: From addictions or abuse, both active and passive (Active meaning they willfully initiated it – alcoholism, substance, gambling, porn; Passive meaning they were afflicted by someone else – sexually, physically, financially, relationally, etc.).
When people ask me if I will counsel them, I explain “I am a triage specialist, not a therapist”. I will then apply the Four Sentence/30-second Rule, and will give them a referral to the appropriate professional people.
If I determine it isn’t counseling but coaching, I’ll meet with them again, but with expectations. Life coaching is a collaborative process in which the coach looks at the player’s attitudes, behaviors and actions directly and gives direction from an outside point of view. He’s not so concerned with how they feel about something as what they do about it. Feeling follows behavior. Let’s work the right behaviors first. If you can’t punch through the feelings to make right choices, well, no one can help someone who isn’t willing to help themselves - and that's why I'm no occupational threat to counselors. I will coach someone for as long as they are making an effort, but I will refer a counselee to a professional counselor.
A specific question follows the process: "How do I know if the player being coached is seriously making an effort at it?" One simple test: Each brief meeting with them gives them three to five things to work on for the next week. I ask them to, within 24 hours, email me what was on that list (as well as to remind me anything else I told them I would provide). I log it into my iPhone to send them a note 48 hours after the meeting if I still have not received their to-do list. Unless there is a really good reason, if I have not heard from them within 72-hours of our meeting, I’m done. If it’s important enough to merit my time, it’s important enough to merit theirs as well.
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